Where Should I Start?

It has been a long journey. A journey that I couldn't believe I made it through alive..but I'm barely breathing. Looking back at what I have accomplish in these 11 months is beyond my expectation. I have come so far from where I have started! Met some incredibly amazing people, learned so much from great leaderships, stumble and fall along the way, reconcile with God again and again... After all these, I still question myself this : Am I living the life of a godly person? Or am I still worldly?

Yes, I made some mistakes and hurt some people. But I'm not perfect. Well, I try to be.. I work hard and push my limits (physically and mentally). It is the expectation that people have set on me that has hurt them. Because they didn't expect the mistakes coming from me. I'm always the "can-do" and "perfectionist" girl. Agree?

However, I know I still have a longer and wider bridge to build and cross over but it takes time and sacrifices along the way..




Am I ready for that? To be stretch by God?

MCR

"You're in depression"
"It's just a fling gone wrong"
"Ain't worth your tears"
"Everything's gonna be fine"
"I understand.."
"Be stronger"
"Only God can heal you"
"Don't skip dinner"

Greater

Eureka moment comes when my mind is totally exhausted but I just can't sleep yet. This is incredible. Mentally and physically drained out from serving God and now He decides to plant a vision in me at 2:27AM. Outrageous but if I slept, the passion and desire to chase that vision will no longer be with me..

The following weeks and months are going to be greater! Lord, please be with me..

Someone

Life is too short to be spent alone. I've just finish watching Ghosts of Girlfriends Past (random). The fear and horror of living a lonely life is unbearable for any human being.

Lately, I have missed talking to God. Miss singing to His songs in the car while I'm stuck in the bad traffic. How is it possible to be so busy with church work til there is no time for Him? I mean, I'm doing God's work but I can't even spend quality time with Him? It's insane. It's like saying I'm having dinner with my family but we're not even communicating. They're just there..

I guess this is the phase where I get too caught up with real life situation and I've placed Him somehow less important. Human beings will always be that way. Imperfectly perfect in God's eyes yet He still loves us. It's just like you, loving your partner even though they made a mistake/hurt you. Because *you* love them enough to forgive them. Life is a journey, not a destination.

We all want to have that special someone to walk with in our lives journeys. Someone that loves us for our good and our bad. Someone that doesn't beat us down but encourages us. Someone that loves Jesus and loves God. Someone who you could not possibly imaging living without him/her. Someone who can instantly make you smile just by the thought of him/her. Someone that shares the same vision and goal with you :)

Eternity is where I want to be.

Land Below The Wind

My 3D2N in Kota Kinabalu was truly filled with exploration and a whole lots of laughter. We went to Mount Kinabalu Park, walk the entire street market (forgotten what it's called) nearby my hotel and met up w Jeremiah, Jethro, Andre and Ferik for McD. I must learn the art of how to control my face from blushing. Seriously! I was blushing on and off for the entire time at McD 8(

However, it was a rather short time span in KK. Flew back to KL on Sunday noon and hello to the normal massive traffic jam again.

ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･ﾟﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･ﾟﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･ﾟ

Aside from Kota Kinabalu, here's what I've been up to. Non other than homeworks..

a plushie headgear for my 3D Studies
it took me exactly 2 days to complete it, everything was hand sew!

12 colour wheel for Design Theory
it's not easy to mix the colour Violet! Took me 4 attempts to get it right, thank God..

love fashion, love my classmates :)

Baroque

It's been a long time since I update my blog with pictures. I do miss the random times when my friends and I just hang out and have a "mini photoshoot" but sigh, no thanks to college work :/ The most recent picture that I took with my camera is my Art History assignment.

The study of Baroque style in art - the strong contrast in light as you can see in the picture above. I'll be having my mid-term exam on Art History in about 5 hours and I just want to get over with it! Unfortunately, there are so many things to memorize *_*

Got tonnes of projects coming up - Barbie doll dress for 3D studies and wearable clothing for Design Theory. The last time I sew something it took me 2 FULL DAYS to finish it off and it's just a head gear..what more an outfit?! Die :(

Moving on, my church had a Facebook LIVE event for the high schoolers and my team did Angry Pacmans! :)

we spent 3 full days working on the props and stuffs!

Chocolate lava with vanilla ice cream is what I'm craving now...
:3

12 more hours before I hop on that plane to Sabah for my cousin's wedding. What a great getaway after my exam. Can't wait!! *grins*

Blank

I'm waiting for you to say you're here to stay
But darling, if you know that it's through
You can't keep doing what you do
If it's time to let go of you..time to let go of you..time to let go of you.

Monday Stress

Quick summary of how my Monday went :

1. Drove to Dr. Koh's clinic with Ashlee
   
2. Got lost on the way there
   
3. Smoke came out from the car bonnet
   
4. Stranded in front of SMK BU3 (somewhere near 1U)
   
5. Called Dad and told him about it
   
6. Called AAM but it was useless so Dad called a workshop toll truck
   
7. Called Ethan and Nicholas for rescue
   
8. They came and waited with me and Ash for the toll truck
9. After 45 mins the toll truck finally came
   
10. After 2 hours of stress and standing under the hot sun, I got to go back already. Yay!

HUGE lorry coming through! I was on the phone with Dad.

Quite an exciting and adventurous day indeed. Thank God for protection and journey mercy despite all the happenings! Turns out that there was a leakage in the water pipe that's why the car ran outta water and that explains the smoke and burnt rubber smell :(

What's Your Conviction?

I woke at 9.15am today and the first thing that came to my mind was "go to Glad Tidings PJ". It was a very random thing that God has put into my mind but heck, I went to bath and went there straight.

11am came and I was already seated right in the center of the HUGE hall. Middle row, horizontally and vertically. I sat alone again. As the service went on, I noticed how different GT was. The crowd were older, the lights for P&W are on, even the singers on stage are in coats! Very new, very different indeed than what I usually see in CHCKL.

Pastor Vincent preached about "Thriving in Babylon" in the book of Daniel. Babylon can be our study place, our work place, our church and so on. Definition of thrive is to progress toward or realize a goal despite or because of circumstances. Instead of surviving through the difficult times, we must thrive through it.

But what really caught my attention was when Pastor Vincent spoke about Conviction. When we know our conviction we will not be easily defeated. Like how Daniel, Hananiah, Mishael and Azariah were true to their conviction and God delivered them. However, we musn't condemn others for their lifestyle and beliefs when we make a stand for ourselves.

Wow..what an empowering message today. Always stay true to your conviction and God will deliver you from it :))

Have a good day tomorrow! xx

Snacks and Drinks

So yesterday Vanes, Ping and I attended Carmen's make-up academy (Diva Production) make-up fashion show at Sungei Wang. The dress code for the event was 80's Rock and Roll but clearly we did not dress a single bit like that! We spent most of the time commenting on every single model that walks out onto the runway, munching on snacks and sipping drinks. Got to see some incredible styles and make-ups! :)

After everything ended, we head over to Secret Recipe for our late dinner. The most awkward thing of all was the waiter who served us, either he is over friendly or just plain weird.. After settling the bill he said "Thank you, terima kasih, xie xie, arigato!!" in a high pitch tone. T'was so funny and awkward at the same time!

College Hall

Hey everyone! So I've been MIA for a long time now. I'm currently at my college MPH listening to Mr. Martin explaining the tools for designers. From how to take care of your brushes to the types of glue. Somewhere in between there is Putty Eraser for charcoal drawing. Oh dear..there's so many things that I don't know! Definitely gonna be a 3 years of new exploration. Best thing of all is I'm so happy to be in my new class with 16 other gals! Yes, you heard me right. There's not a single boy in it. Hehe! Okay gotta dash now. Gonna have picture session for my student card and according to Carlson, we are allowed to pose in it. Lol! Bye loves :D

Nothing Is Impossible

Tonight was magical. I just met someone 6 hours ago who has left a great impact on me.

"Every one can be the same but what makes you different from the others is God's anointing. That's what make you special." she said to me while I was telling her about my dilemmas in choosing the path I want to take for my education. And she continued, "Deep down you already know what you want to do but you just want people's opinion. Well, don't listen to what they say because in the end of the day, it is you who will be going through it. I think nothing is easy. Fashion is not easy. Medicine is not easy either. But doing something you like gives you the drive to do it well."

I couldn't believe it. After all the long hours of talk with my parents and the discussions with my friends... With just a simple 20 minutes drive to Tropicana in the backseat of the car, sitting beside someone who I just knew not even an hour yet, could somehow and might change my future.

"Whenever you have to design something from scratch and you need inspiration and creativity.. you just have to pray to God for that he will give you those important things. Just gotta keep on praying to Him and you'll find a way." she said to me with confidence and faith.

Tonight was a life changing experience. God has answered my prayer and it's all good. Hallelujah :))



"Through You, I can do anything, I can do all things 'cause it's You who gives me strength. Nothing is impossible" - Planet Shakers

True Meaning Of CNY

I've been feeling so nostalgic these few days. It must be the cause of Chinese New Year lol. Anyway, 2011 is truly a real beginning for me. I've got no more excuses to NOT help out cleaning the house. hahah! No school, no college and no work. My friends tell me that I'm living the easy life with nothing to worry about while they are already in college. They have to rush their assignments while I just sit around the house and sleep all day.

But friends, let me tell you..it's not as easy as you think! I figure, on an average day my brain will process 5 things at the same time. Which college should I go? What should I study? Would I want to go overseas to future my studies? Will my job secure me a good career in the future? Will I be financially stable to provide for my parents next time?

Of course every child would want to give what's best to their parents. We have to learn how to be sacrificial and to honour our parents in every single way. At the end of the day, they're the one who sacrificed their everything just to teach us the value of life - appreciate life like a gem. My parents always taught me how to be humble and thankful for what we have. If living in a middle class family can bring us happiness and health then I wouldn't mind living it for the rest of my life. "Blood is thicker than water" that's what my dad used to say. They're the ones who I run to when I'm facing any problems or I just need a listening ear.

I guess I'm really a homey person. Or you can say a papa and mama kinda girl. hahaha. Well friends, sometimes we can instantly be frustrated at our parents and thinking that they don't understand us at all! But hey, they were once our age and went through what we are going through now. Don't you think that you ought to give a thought about what they are about to say before you cut them off? :)

This Chinese New Year is another season of giving and honouring our parents. Ang paos and cny cookies are just side dishes. It is truly the time to reunite the bond with your parents, your siblings, your cousins and your relatives. It's never too late to turn a new leaf as long as you have the heart to do it! :))

Happy Chinese New Year & Gong Xi Fa Cai!!

You're So Funny

IO camp @ Peace Haven

How are you doing?? I hope you're good. Well, thanks to XP that's why I'm here writing another short update :)

I can't believe camp is finally over. It's been almost a week since the first day of it and tomorrow will be our camp reunion at church. Wow..looking back at our first camp meeting months ago and now we're about to plan our NEXT IO camp again!! Gotta admit that being part of the Game Master was not easy at all but we managed to pull it together and gave everyone a whole lots of fun, right right?

Looking back at how much I've grew since I came to church, no words can describe it as much as I wish I could. It was Gladys who first brought me to CHC in mid 2009 and people often ask me how I knew her. Well, you probably wouldn't have guessed it but the answer is I knew her through blogger. hahaha. God truly work in funny ways sometimes :))

Goodnight, lovelies! xx

So Tell Me

what's life after form 5?? Is it the time when you truly experience the value of friendship? The value of money paid for your college fund? Still unsure of what you wanna do in life? Never thought that high school would be over so quickly?


Somehow these thoughts have been lingering on my mind for a pretty long time. I know who I want to be, what I want to do and how I want to succeed it. Every single detail in becoming a Fashion Designer, I knew it all. But is this the calling from God or am I just following someone's foot steps?

Deep down I'm still unsure of the choices in life I've made. Some were good while some were pretty bad. We all are free to make our own choices but we are not free to choose our consequences.


I guess I finally came to a point in life where every person I know will be going their own direction in life. It's tough to see them go but eventually everyone has to grow up and start a carrier, a family and have grandchildren. This is the cycle of life and well, I'm not prepared for it yet. Guess I didn't see it coming so quickly :/

It's all mixed up feelings and thoughts. Sorry if you might not understand this cryptic post because neither could I explain it myself.

Asians

D'you know what's the down part being an Asian? Is that some of us might have uneven eye lids! I know we're famous for our doe eyes and single eye lids and maybe even our doll-like eyes. But somehow our genes got mix up and ka-boom, we got uneven eye lids :((

My right eye is more round and has double eyelid while my left eye is more doe-like and has single eyelid. It's really difficult for me to put on my eyeliner because it will look uneven sometimes *sulk*

I know now there's a double-eyelid tape in the drug store to create natural double eyelid but I couldn't be bothered to use one cos I'm so lazy just like that -.o (Why am I even talking about eyelids anyway??)

Last but not least, I finally got my Grey Booties from F21 today! Been searching high and low for it since I don't even know when. hahaha.

aren't they lovely? :))

Hope you all have a great weekend ahead. God bless and I'll see you soon! xx

Who's Ready For 2011?

Hello, hello!

So how did *you* celebrate your new year? Well, I stayed home doing another Vlog while counting down to 2011. I guess as the older we get, the less we are excited bout new years. Who's with me??

Anyway! I just wanna wish everyone a Happy New Year and God bless ya'll :)