Here I Am

with "I'll Keep Waiting" by S Club 7 on the replay at 4am on a New Year's Day

"Dry these tears of rain. Say you'll show me love again"

There's so many things on my mind right now but I just can't find the exact word to say it. It's been a month full of ups and downs. Many boundaries have been created yet many rules have been broken. I don't even know myself sometimes. Like I'm lost in between of so many events happening and I just can't find my way back home.

"I'll keep waiting till that day when you come back from home to me"

I miss home, it's the only place where I can fully be myself. Instead of constantly having a mask on my face, pretending that everything is alright while it's not. It's called living in denial btw. Some call it delusional. Whatever. The point is when you are too busy with other things, love might pass you by, good friends might pass you by, family might pass you by and even God might pass you by.

"life's too short to live without you"

I think that's what happening to me right now. I'm constantly busy but I'm missing out the best of life that I can get. But when you finally realize it, it's already too late to turn back. There's no such thing as time machine in this world.

"where you are is where I wanna be"

I don't wanna regret again like last time. I missed out the best thing that life could ever offer me which is love and family. It's a mistake I did that should never be repeated nor remembered. However, I'm blessed for having a second chance in life, to meet/love someone like you and this time I'm not gonna make the same mistake ever again. Once bitten, twice shy. Let's just hope 2010 will be a good year for us, love :)

p/s heaven doesn't come knocking on our door twice so be grateful for what you have.

XX JEAN